The new PC Terms when talking about a female

         She is not:
         A BAD COOK
         She is:
         MICROWAVE COMPATIBLE

        She does not:
         GET PMS
         She becomes:
         HORMONALLY HOMICIDAL

         She does not have:
         A KILLER BODY
         She is:
         TERMINALLY ATTRACTIVE

         She is not:
         A BAD DRIVER
         She is:
         AUTOMOTIVELY CHALLENGED

         She is not a:
         PERFECT 10
         She is:
         NUMERICALLY SUPERIOR

         She is not:
         EASY
         She is:
         HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE

         She does not:
         HATE SPORTS ON TV
         She is:
         ATHLETICALLY BIASED

         You do not ask her:
         TO DANCE
         You request a:
         PRE-COITAL RHYTHMIC EXPERIENCE

         She is not:
         HOOKED ON SOAP OPERAS
         She is:
         MELODRAMATICALLY FIXATED

         She is not:
         COLD OR FRIGID
         She is:
         THERMALLY INCOMPATIBLE

         She does not:
         WEAR TOO MUCH MAKE-UP
         She is:
         COSMETICALLY OVERSATURATED

         She does not have:
         GREAT CLEAVAGE
         Her breasts are:
         CENTRALLY LOCATED

         She is not:
         A SCREAMER OR MOANER
         She is:
         VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE

         She does not:
         SUN BATHE
         She experiences:
         SOLAR ENHANCEMENT

         She does not:
         CUT YOU OFF
         She becomes:
         HORIZONTALLY INACCESSIBLE

         She does not have:
         BIG HAIR
         She is:
         OVERLY AEROSOLED

         She does not:
         SHOP TOO MUCH
         She is:
         OVERLY SUSCEPTIBLE TO MARKETING PLOYS

NAN

A man goes into a bar and noticing a very attractive woman, sits beside her. Looking her over, he notices her brief case with the letters NAN and says, "NAN can I buy you a drink?".

The girl looks up and says, "Yes you can , but my name is not NAN."

To which the man replies, ì what does Nan stand for. The lady explains that NAN is the National Association of Nyphomanics and that they are having a local convention.

To which the man asks, What do they discuss at these conventions.

The Lady replies that they discuss the attributes of men......for example we know that Native American Men are well endowed, that Jewish men know exactly what to say to a woman and that men from the countryside have staying power.  They can go on for hours on end.

Then she says,"Enough about me and NAN..what is your name?"

The man replies...My name is TONTO GOLDBERG, but my friends call me BUBBA